The pain was instant. Time didn’t slow down. I didn’t have any flashbacks. I felt my leg snap before I even touched the ground. I hit the pavement on my chest and skid across the wet gravel. My helmet stopped just before hitting the sidewalk. I couldn’t breathe, and I had to wrestle my gloves and helmet off in a desperate attempt to provide some kind of relief. I screamed and screamed hoping the pain would go away, but it only amplified with every passing second.

I looked over at the intersection to find the driver who had just hit me parked in the middle of the intersection. His wheels began to turn, and my heart stopped. He nearly took my life, and he planned to leave the scene. I screamed, “YOU MOTHERF—-R!” Knowing full well I was in no position to follow him or grab a license plate number. It must have awoken something in him, because he stopped and got out of the car.

There were two drivers perpendicular to where the crash happened, and I looked over at them. They made eye contact with me, so I know they saw me, but their lights turned green, and they drove away. It was without question the loneliest moment of my life.

Eventually, my howls woke up the neighbors and they came running out to help me. Even with the situation at hand, I remained socially aware and put on my public face as they arrived on the scene. I slowed my breathing, and answered their questions with the understanding that cooperation would only expedite the process of getting me into an ambulance.

When the paramedics arrived and hauled me into the van, I snapped right back to my usual personality. I poked fun at people in the ambulance and made jokes where I could. I wasn’t going to let some broken bones stop me from self-medicating with laughter.

I remember the paramedics were cutting the pants off my leg to identify the wound when I stopped them and grabbed everyone’s attention. “Hey!” All eyes were on me. I said, “It’s really cold and rainy so don’t judge me on the size.”

They did their jobs professionally and gracefully, and we laughed all the way to the hospital. I like to think that it was the most fun anyone has ever had in the back of an ambulance.


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